We are all predisposed to judgement.
In every moment, your brain makes subtle decisions on what is good and what is not. What is safe and what is dangerous. What moves you closer to the future you desire and what pulls you in the direction of an eventual Netflix purgatory.
For me, this was no clearer than the other day, when I lost my wallet.
It was the birthday of one of my loyal subscribers, Kelsey. In an effort to love her well, I lost my wallet between 5:50 am and 6:30 am. Without the slightest clue what happened, it escaped my possession (I assumed I left it at home). After all, how could one lose their wallet before daybreak?
It wasn’t until later that night when I realized it wasn’t at home either.
Of course, I also had eight missed calls from the Broward County Sheriff’s Office. The wallet was found and given to the local fire station, who gave it to the ole sheriff.
Before I finish the story, let’s run it back to my belief that we’re predisposed to judgement. Have you ever lost your wallet?
(Well, now twice.)
I was a college sophomore and it was 2007. I dropped it in a Publix parking lot. It turned up a few cities over, stripped of cash and tattered beyond repair. A lesson learned on looking after what’s valuable.
Perhaps you’ve felt that same feeling – the pit in your stomach when you lose something important. The second pit when it comes back worse than you left it.
Would you blame me if I felt that same feeling again?
A few hundred dollars in cash. At least $100 in gift cards. Valuable personal information, not limited to my IDs, credit cards, and the like. All gone.
Except it wasn’t.
The next day, I drove 45 minutes to the sheriff’s office to pick up my wallet. It was perfectly intact, with not a single dollar missing.
I thought this was a joke. Surely, their inventory of my wallet had been wrong. Whoever found it must’ve taken a little finder’s fee for themselves. After all, twenty dollars or a Nike gift card goes a long way for a good deed.
And yet, my belief that wallets never come home in one piece was shattered on that day. Because it did.
Are you like me? Do you believe that wallets always come back lighter for the occasion? Perhaps you think that only good people get good things or that people can hear you when you yell on the freeway.
Consider this a learning occasion.
Our daily judgements are ripe to be broken. Whatever you’re thinking, take stock. Maybe it isn’t as much of a sure thing as you might believe.
I know I’m taking this train of thinking over to my coaching ability. If my expectations on the practice field are only set because I believe them to be, I’m probably wrong. And if they’re wrong, what am I missing out on? More reps, more skill-building, or greater results? The very nature of going with the mental status quo may be hindering me from creating future wins. That’s sobering.
So let’s do it. Let’s break agreement with daily assumptions and see what great new things come to the forefront. It’s not natural and it takes work, but if you think unnatural things, maybe you’ll see greater than natural results.
Thanks for reading!
Creating Future Wins is my blog about life, leadership, and lacrosse. My heart is to create a mixture of writing that you can’t find anywhere else and I’d love for you to be a part of this journey. Hit that subscribe button and of course, if you value what I’m doing here, I’d love for you to subscribe to my premium content.